First, start your water boiling. You want to get a nice, rolling boil going, so keep those flames hot. Once you've got the boil going, you'll start your journey by tossing in a handful of dirt. Doesn't matter where it comes from, but don't skimp on that handful. Add three oak leaves, with the veins removed, and two acorns. Let the mixture stew for a moment, then put on your protective clothing. Add a fourth-generation honeybee queen, being careful to keep the drones defending her from touching the boil. Using a stick from a sapling of less than two years, stir the mixture three times counter-clockwise. Then, add the saltpeter and step back – you should see a healthy boom.
If the pot survives the explosion. Instantly remove it from heat and let the mixture congeal. Scoop out three spoonfuls onto three separate cheesecloths, and place them at the corners of an equilateral triangle the size of the portal you wish to make. Make sure that the triangle points northwards – a south-pointing triangle is not something you want to experience. Step into the triangle formed by the three cheesecloths and do the hokey pokey but do NOT turn yourself around. Following this, hold your breath for three seconds and jump. If you have completed the recipe correctly, you should break through the ground into Flavortown. If not, you will land solidly on the ground and will lose your access for three years.
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